Sex & Sexuality

We get asked this question a lot. A whole lot. The trouble is, there’s just no way to give you and others the sort of answer I suspect you are looking for. But I certainly can tell you why I can’t do that. Sex – of any kind, whether we’re talking about intercourse, oral sex, manual sex…

If a healthy sex life is very important to you, I’d suggest you start by being sure you’re approaching sex with a partner in a way that is realistic. One essential aspect of healthy sexuality for ourselves and our partners is having our ideas about sexuality based in reality, and being sure our…

Let’s take a few minutes and break everything down into separate thoughts. First and foremost, you need to consider readiness. How do you feel about sex becoming a part of your relationship right now and especially for you personally about starting to have sex? Do you feel that at this point in your…

The short and easy answer: not everyone will feel so compelled as to moan during sex, so there’s nothing wrong with you. A lack of moaning does not mean that you’re not enjoying yourself, just as the presence of moaning does not mean that you are enjoying yourself. So now that we’ve knocked out the…

Masturbation is natural and in no way unhealthy for people of any gender if and when it is what someone wants for themselves. It’s also not something that’s just okay or healthy for guys, or more healthy or okay for men than for women. It’s something that the majority of most people do and report…

If you want to have any kind of sex with another woman, even together, than it’s not honest to say you don’t want another woman. You obviously do, in this way. As well, another partner is a person: not a sex toy, not an object, not some new “thing.” So, for everyone’s sake – particularly for that…

Consent is an active process and agreement, and it cannot be coerced. The absence of no does not mean yes. No matter how well you think that you know your partner, you should never assume that you know her thoughts in that instant about sex and what she may want or not want to do. She should also…

Please understand that anal sex is sex. It is no more or less sex than vaginal intercourse is, just like oral sex is sex and manual sex (fingering or handjobs) are sex: that’s why all those terms end with the word “sex.” So, if you do not want to have sex until marriage, then don’t have sex until…

Unfortunately, some women don’t know or understand when they’re carrying around double-standards when it comes to being ready for sex. You’re not the first guy to ask this question or be in this situation. Just like it is for women, guys are not somehow automatically ready for sex any time their…

When it comes to sex and particularly to the issue of orgasm, expectation can be your worst enemy. As soon as you are worrying about whether you are normal or stressing about a specific event happening or not happening then you’re creating anxiety for yourself, which is a huge barrier to actually…